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Patrick Walsh

I like to move it. Move it.

It's The End of the World As We Know It

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posted Thursday, 10 August 2006

Don't know if any of you caught George W. on the news this morning, but he sure didn't seem all that worked up about yet another terrorist threat.

You mark my words, this man will go down as the worst President in this nation's history. Joking and laughing with other old white dudes as he sauntered up to the mike, he spat out (maybe) two incoherent minutes of babble about "enemies of freedom," and then stumbled off again. He put no passion in his words, no emotion, no...anything. The basic gist of his speech was "We're fucked. Somebody ought to do somethin' about it soon. I'm gonna go grab a breakfast burrito."

How about you, George? You're the PRESIDENT! You're supposed to make us feel better, not bumble into our homes at 8:30AM casually flapping your jaw about how much danger we're in. HELP US!

I've said this a lot lately and I really think it's true. The world will end by 2020. I truly feel that way.

We have a President that WE don't respect, let alone the rest of the globe. I was thinking the other day, this Al Gore movie An Inconvenient Truth, its doing really big business, lot of people talking very seriously about it, lot of very valid concern over the environment stemming from the points it raises. Do you think if George W. made a movie, about anything, that anyone would see it? He simply couldn't make a movie, for starters, but if he did it would be a joke, even to his supporters. Whatever you think of Al Gore, people take him seriously. Does anyone still feel that way about Bush? It's horrifying.

I mean, here we are, gas prices are well over $3.00 a gallon. Our country is in the middle of a war no one pays attention to. Crippling heat and blackouts sweep a new part of the country every couple days. Devastating disasters destroy a new part of the world every couple months. Things continue to escalate in the Middle East. Lots of people want us dead. And so on and so on and scooby dooby dooby.

And with each new obstacle, each new disaster, each new threat, the world responds with a collective shrug of the shoulders. I say live it up now, I really believe we've got about 15 years to go before the world just officially gives up and we're all dead.

Happy Thursday!

Oh, and if you're not convinced that the world is ending, check this story out. I have a feeling the photograph might grab your attention.

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/08/10/world/asia/10china.html?_r=1&oref=slogin

At least they didn't eat him.

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What do you think? Leave me a comment! (9)


1. jill left...
Friday, 11 August 2006 9:00 am

I'm glad you like the China article Pat, so sad! And I agree with you, it is soo scary whats going on in the world right now! BUT then I wonder, in the 1940's, did people think the world was going to end? Also, as I learned in my media classes at college, media is deisgned to make us afraid, even though there is a lot fo shit to be scared of, i think things can get blown out of proportion. I don't know, either way i'm scared, so mission accomplished. I think religion is to blame for a lot of this mess and the rest of the mess in the world. thats why i hate religion. sorry, i hope i dont get killed now.


2. Bryan left...
Friday, 11 August 2006 4:53 pm

2020, huh? If that's the case, then I really need to work on getting laid more.

And Jill is correct, religion does a lot more harm than good. I also think that the planet really does hate us. If I were Mother Earth, I'd probably consider the human race to be like a rash or a bunyon. Some unpleasant little condition that's annoying right now, but will soon be going away once the right ointment is applied. (And by ointment, I mean the melting polar ice caps, or perhaps a massive explosion at the Pert Plus factory. (First it's box cutters, now shampoo? Damn, those terrorists are crafty!)).

But don't let what I just wrote give you the mistaken notion that I'm depressed. On the contrary, every time life gets me down, I just think about the fact that, with a different twist of fate, I could be in a North Korean forced labor camp, or dying of AIDs in Africa, or a whore with no teeth in one of HBO's "Hookers at the Point" documentaries. (Anybody else find those too depressing to jerk off to?)

So what I'm saying is that the knowledge that the world is often such a dark and horrible place kind of makes me feel better about my own life by keeping my own trivial problems in perspective. But then again, isn't that pretty depressing? The fact that it takes the terrible suffering of others to remind me that, all in all, I've been pretty lucky.

Man, it's all such a fucking mess. That's why I've decided to start drinking in the middle of the day. Cheers, Pat. And happy Friday!


3. Patrick Walsh left...
Friday, 11 August 2006 5:31 pm

Jill,

Yes, media is there to scare us, but also scary is the...gagillions of horrifying things that take place each day. And yes, religion factors in HEAVILY to most of this shit.

Bryan,

Good points there. As for the "we could have it worse" sentiment, I think that was best summed up in a little tune called "Oliver's Army" by my hero Elvis Costello:

"If you're out of luck or out of work, We could send you to Johannesburg."

You can find the whole song's lyrics here, probably the only pop song to include the "N" word. Incredible stuff. Especially considering the song sounds like ABBA.

http://www.absolutelyrics.com/lyrics/view/elvis_costello/oliver's_army/


4. JJ left...
Friday, 11 August 2006 8:13 pm :: http://dnc.org/a/2006/08/strong_turnout.

Pat, I agree with every word that you typed for this post. Except the 2020 part.


5. JJ left...
Friday, 11 August 2006 10:05 pm :: http://fuse.tv/upload/pantsoff.php

PS: Any thoughts about the tv show / website 'Pants off Dance off'!?


6. Jackson left...
Saturday, 12 August 2006 8:28 am

Here's a little poem I like to think of when I indulge in these sort of dark thoughts:

Razors pain you;

Rivers are damp;

Acids stain you;

Drugs cause cramp.

Guns aren't lawful;

Nooses give;

Gas smells awful;

Might as well live.

-Dorothy Parker

It's also quite useful if you want to have sex with goth chicks.


7. Patrick Walsh left...
Sunday, 13 August 2006 12:31 am

JJ,

I don't really know what to say about this dance off/pants off. I'd never seen it. What is the point if they don't show you the nudity? I'll say it seems like a pretty horrible idea.

Jackson,

Nothing's cooler than a 25 year old man quoting Dorothy Parker.

Allow me to quote Dorothy Zbornak (Bea Arthur) to you when I say: "Rose, if I have to hear one more story about Saint Olaf...!"


8. Jackson Burke left...
Sunday, 13 August 2006 9:07 am

Personally, I find my coolness pales in comparison to guys who know the last name of Bea Arthur's character on "Golden Girls."


9. RØB left...
Friday, 20 March 2009 12:59 pm :: http://www.pancakeproductions.net

I only vaguely remember this post, but I probably didn't post a comment because I don't like to get into politics.

That said, I DO like to get into history, and that's the impetus behind my comment here. I think saying Bush II will go down in history as our nation's worst is probably an exaggeration. An atrocity he most certainly was, and the worst in our lifetimes, perhaps, but there are the Warren G. Hardings, the Andrew Johnsons, the Ulysses S. Grants, the Richard M. Nixons, the Woodrow Wilsons, and the James Buchanans to consider for all-time worst AT PRESENT, let alone in our nation's history.

Even if the world ends in 2020 (and for my part, I figure there's as good a chance of that as there is of anything, so we'll go with it), we'll have 2, maybe 3 more Presidential elections. Plenty of time to get a bigger boob in there than W (if we haven't already).